Where Sida attends Orientation, and ponders the ramifications of being a Med student

It was the first day of uni today. It was alright. (For those readers who just tuned in, I am talking about the Bachelor of Medicine / Bachelor of Surgery program at UQ)

The orientation talks were presented by the various Professors and Doctors and Chairs and Heads. It was all a little mind-boggling, just the titles themselves. Each of them congratulated us for getting in, told us what a good decision we'd made, and some pretty much hailed us as colleagues. There was some talk about what the different strands are all about (Clinical skills, public health, ethics and professional practice, and biomedical science). But a great deal was said that went along the lines of: "If you have any concerns, just realise that you're not alone, and you can come to [me/student support/your peers] for support." It was nice to hear the Heads and Chairs offer themselves to us, but also rather daunting. Is the course really that bad, that such a big deal is made about support and counselling? (Yes, this is how I think when I am in a cynical phase, which I suspect I am in right now.)

Much was said about how difficult this course is, and how it's going to be a long and difficult year. Actually, not a lot was said about it but it was certainly repeated a few times. The Head of School said "It's a long and difficult year which leads into another long and difficult year which leads into 2 difficult years of clinical practice" and I thought, you might as well add: "which leads into a long and difficult career". I realise now that I probably need to cut out some church stuff. Currently I attend Saturday afternoon youth group and Sunday morning service, and there is Wednesday night bible study too, to commense whenever our leader can negociate better work hours. I can't bear to part with any of them really. But if it came down to it, I suppose I will sacrifice Saturday afternoons. I also plan to work some weekends too. I get a headache just thinking about it. I need to plan, to rationalise, to be organised, and to work efficiently. Everything that I'm not.

It strikes me how people act when I tell them I'm a medicine student. Oh, wow, they say. You must be so smart. I have difficulty figuring out how I should act when people do that, so I just smile. It is enough that my parents brag about me, but I noted something strange this sunday. People at church are doing it too. This Sunday my bible study leader did it, and it's the second time someone from church paid me a great deal of praise to a stranger in front of me. My achievements are really just nothing, but I must admit it makes a great story, and, told the right way (with the appropriate pauses), it makes people say wow. (But the same trick is done by the 'current affairs' shows like Today Tonight, it doesn't make whatever dispute they've got showing worthwhile.) But when you tell people you do medicine, and they say wow, how do you deal with it? I want to say "actually, it's just that I'm too stubborn to give up. And God."

Speaking of God, I thanked the guy at church yesterday, the guy who showed me Isaiah 30:18. I didn't say anything, just "thank you for showing that scripture with me" and he said "That's ok" and tapped my shoulder in a knowing manner. It was as if he knew, which he couldn't have. I wonder what God has been telling him.