The Cedars of Lebanon

Last year, a good friend of mine invited me to his church's 14th birthday celebrations. They hired the UQ centre, and it was like one big party (the praise and worship had break dancers etc), followed by a sermon. At the end, my friend asked me whether I wanted to stay back and meet some of his friends. I wasn't extremely keen, because he wasn't the greatest person when it comes to introductions, and because I was starting to feel hot and tired... but once I saw the gigantic creamy chocolate cake they had on offer, my decision became simple.

Introducing myself to people proved rather difficult, because it was crowded and noisy, and because I'd forget people I met only seconds after I meet them, producing the rather embarrassing situation of introducing yourself to them twice. My friend stood by looking around and not being particularly helpful. (Or at least that's how I remembered it... hehe) But anyway, I digress.

"Hi, my name is Sida" I say to one guy.
"Zita, nice to meet you" he says
"No, it's Si-da"
"Sita! I'm sorry..."
"No no, SI-DA... like the Cedars of Lebanon"

At this point, my friend next to me started chuckling and looked at me sideways, but wouldn't tell me what he was laughing at. I decided not to press him, partly because it wouldn't work, and partly because if he told me I probably wouldn't have liked it anyway. What's wrong with the cedars of Lebanon? Big, tall, fragrant tree mentioned in the bible for its majestic loftiness, used to build temples and palaces. After I got home I decided to look it up in the bible to make sure.

I found that, while the bible exhalts the cedar tree in some places, there are much more passages humbling it. The latter made me feel uncomfortable and I decided not to introduce myself to Christians as the cedars of Lebanon again. All this was tucked away in my mind, until yesterday, when I realised that this tree teaches me an important lesson in this stage of my life. I guess that's the long-winded introduction to what I'm about to write about.

The Cedars of Lebanon

The cedars of Lebanon is a type of pine tree, and its many endearing qualities make it an important tree historically, culturally, and in Judaism and Islam. Light in colour, fragrant in scent, strong, hard, and resistent to insects... the Lebanese people are so proud of their tree, it's their national emblem, and occupies the central position in their national flag.

In the bible, the cedar was used by Solomon to build the temple, as well as his palace. (In fact, the bible records that he called his palace the Forest of Lebanon.) Additionally, there are many verses that praise the cedar tree for its strength and majesty, and if something was to be described as very grand and beautiful, it was described (frequently in the Song of Songs and the Psalms) as being like the cedars of Lebanon.

On the other hand, there are also many verses that describe God humbling the cedar, and showing His power and righteousness. Psalm 29:5 says: "The voice of the LORD breaks the cedars; the LORD breaks in pieces the cedars of Lebanon". In the books of Isaiah and Ezekiel, the prophets compare proud nations to cedars, arrogant, cruel, and standing tall above other trees, but eventually coming to a crashing burning end under divine judgement. The myriad of verses that show the cedar in this manner made me never want to say "Sida like the cedar of Lebanon" again.

Now I think about it, it does show two aspects of my life and of my psyche. On the one hand, some of my qualities have been able to be used by God in His church, and though I am nothing like the cedars, I do believe that God has shown His grace and glory through what I do. But, of late, slowly and subtly, these same qualities have made me proud, and of course, with pride comes insecurity - the constant niggling feeling that you're actually not as good as you think you are, and the fear that others may find out. I know that this pride could eventually lead me far away from God, focussing not on Him but on myself and what others think of me. My ministry would eventually become meaningless, leading to one thing - crash.

Deuteronomy 9:17-18 tells us that the good things we are gifted with or have acquired, are not just because of our ability, because even if it were, the mere ability comes from God. I may be blessed in some respects, but I should never fool myself into thinking that these are my own work... I'm on God's journey, my abilities were given to me from Him, in order to serve Him. There is no appropriate attitude to take except for complete humility and servitude to Him and to others.

I'm amazed at how much I wrote... actually on this topic right now I could go on and on and on... but it is nearly midnight, I have a stomach ache, it's so hot I can hardly breathe, and so sleep seems like a very good idea right now.

Looking at stars

Looking at stars with you this summer night
We lie facing the heavens, the dry, warm ground on our skin
The insect repellent incense fills the air with smoke and magic
"What's that star there?" you ask

I take you to a world of nebulas, clusters, black holes and supernovas,
A world so far away in space and in time, your mind cannot grasp,
And your eyes open wide with childish wonder
Somehow, you think I can name every star in the sky.

I take you to ancient Greece, where the minotaur roams,
Orion boasts with his club, and the Big Dog guards the night sky
I bring out my telescope, and show you
Pleides, and Jupiter's companions: Io, Europa, and Ganymede
And the dark side of the moon, swallowing the light

One day you will grow up, and the moon's pock-marked face will no longer allure you,
You will no longer be interested in the twinkle of the Pleides,
Or wonder what Orion is dreaming of tonight
But until that day comes, you have reminded me
Just how simple, how beautiful, and yet, how mysterious God's creation is
Do you see His glory? Can you hear His song?

Sleep now, little brother, sleep and dream
Dream of the light dancing across the infinite spaces
Of the serene nebulae and the laughing galaxies
Dream of Jason and his argonauts, of Orion and his sword,
Dream the dreams of innocence and childhood
Before the world awakens you.