Sida is evil

Today, the registrar asked me to grab some pathology containers to put blood samples in. I didn't know which one to get, so I grabbed all of them...

He only needed two, so I was left with 4 empty pathology tubes.

I was too lazy to take them back to the storage room... so I just put them in my pocket.

They went from my pocket to my bag, from my bag to my table... and now, they are in my fridge.

"Sida, why are they in your fridge?" I hear my dear readers ask.

Well, you see... as I was standing there in theatre, feeling tired and dreadfully bored, it occurred to me that I could have a lot of fun with these containers. Imagine my dear mother's surprise and disgust when she opens the fridge and sees some pathology containers - all containing something yellow, purulent, and offensively mysterious. The thought was too sweet to dismiss, and I couldn't wait to get home.

Unfortunately my 11 year old brother was home when I got home too, so I had to let him in on the secret... but he promises to be a good sport.

In one tube (the EDTA tube), I put a mixture of Apple-Guava juice, cooking oil, and a drop of soy sauce. The oil separated nicely from the juice, which was again separated by the tube additive... I gave it a good shake... and, voila, I'm a genius. I created a purulent fluid resembling sputum.

In another, was a mixture of squid sauce and soy-sauce (giving it a lovely brown). In yet another, was the good old fashioned tomato sauce, mixed with some water.

I would have LOVED to take a picture of the containers for your entertainment, but unfortunately as soon as I'd done all this and put the items back, my mum's car drove in the driveway. I quickly put them all into a small plastic dish, and pushed it into the fridge, behind the capsicums. I will take a picture later, maybe, after mum goes to sleep.

I really hope she discovers it when I'm not at home - then, her imagination will run REALLY wild, she will be totally disgusted, but she won't be able to question me. Being a dutiful mother, she will assume that it is something work-related, so she won't throw it away. In fact her imagination will run so wild, she will imagine all sorts of disgusting things, and she won't be able to even TOUCH it. That is the evil dilemma I have placed my mother in - she will be disgusted to the core, but unable to do anything about it.

But now I have a problem. Say if she found it when I'm at home... what explanation should I offer? It should undoubtedly involve something to do with bacteria, or parasites. But why would the specimen be in MY fridge, rather than in the hospital? I need an explanation that is plausible, not too far-fetched, but never the less disgusting. And, if possible, I would like to convince her to keep it in the fridge for at least a month.

Any suggestions? Please help! Comments welcome.